Remember that forgiveness is primarily for YOU.

Grudges take up brain capacity and prevent us from performing at our very best. What we focus our minds upon grows; this is true of hatred too. Therefore, it is impossible to truly achieve great things for ourselves when we have a lot of our energetic capacity tied up in negativity.

Remember that forgiveness is primarily for YOU. It free up your energy tremendously. So forgive all grudges, no matter how old they may be, and seek reconciliation. If you find this hard, begin with the easiest ones first. Then gradually work up to the harder ones.

All the years you have waited for them to "make it up to you" and all the energy you expended trying to make them change (or make them pay) kept the old wounds from healing and gave pain from the past free rein to shape and even damage your life.

And still they may not have changed.

Nothing you have done has made them change.

Indeed, they may never change. Inner peace is found by changing yourself, not the people who hurt you.

And you change yourself for yourself, for the joy, serenity, peace of mind, understanding, compassion, laughter, and bright future that you get."

Sidney and Suzanne Simon 

Comments

[Wilma]

The easy way to forgive is to forget. Moving forward and keep pressing on no matter you've been going through. Life is beautiful and challenging. Live the life you LOVE. Wilma

[Jane]

Melissa, you are punishing ONLY yourself by GUILT. WE ALL have done things to 'others' that haunt us, eat away at us, and you know what? THOSE negative feelings are coming from us. Guilt comes from our OWN heads, our OWN thoughts. You MUST change your thoughts and a big thing is changing your PERSPECTIVE. You can look at these 'things' that you are calling (and so does our Western Religious upbringings) 'sins' as something that SINS implies - negativity. Stop - think about it. You must now look at what you have done as learning experiences because that is exactly what they were. You have learned from them a great deal - this will make you a stronger person, a more educated person, and therefore in the end happier. But you must LET GO of these 'past' 'sins.' And stop labeling them as such a negative thing as 'sins.'

What is done, is done. You cannot go back and re-do it. Impossible. You can only go forward. So why waste your energy in misery and self-punishment (guilt) by continually dwelling on them? THEY ARE THE PAST. LET GO - FORGIVE YOURSELF AND ALLOW YOURSELF TO MOVE FORWARD.

As Emerson said SO WISELY and man, it is so true - "Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."

And remember - sometimes we lose site of what we are doing, where we are, and of others around us. Sometimes it could be only 1 day in our life, or it could be several years of simply becoming lost in darkness. But always remember, there is light - and you must find it. It is not difficult to do once you let yourself off the hook. You are human. And lastly, remember too that YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANYONE ELSE'S REALITY. You are responsible for your own ONLY - no matter what your religion has EVER taught you.

And be sure to subscribe to POSITIVE THOUGHTS...waking up each morning and reading 'their' emails I have discovered, reminds me of what I already know in my heart, and helps me to stay focused each and every day...and to keep my positive perspective...and that makes me a very contented human being no matter what I have done in my past - on the contrary, I feel blessed for every single solitary experience - both negative and positive - because even the negative I have taken away something from it all and turned it into GOLD.

[Lauren Dallin]

It's true. Anger, jealousy, grudges are all energy draining. What good does it do anyone? Let it go, move on, learn from it and just be happy with yourself. That's who you really need to think about. Don't waste time on the negative. Be positive and hang out with positive people!!

Happy day!

[Miriam Buhr]

Very wise counsel Nancy! Indeed free the thing that constricts your essence and you'll be more OPEN to BE okay in your own skin and to receive that which is rightfully yours. Forgiving self is just as difficult but when you release expectations that don't serve you, and release what is holding your mind hostage, you liberate yourself from that which limits and belittles you.

~Miriam

[Mellissa]

Am finding it difficult to forgive myself :(

[Mellissa]

Having trouble forgiving myself 4 some pretty big sins, any suggestions?

[karina loureiro]

I'm glad you like it! and you're right the blog is updated daily. Blessings:)

[Tina]

Bloody cool comment. I loved reading this. I found that you update the blog daily. I've bookmarked the site. Thanks a lot!